Believing, Speaking, Living

Another challenge I received this weekend while reading beautiful posts from friends around the blogosphere was to consider this question from Kyndra Steinmann:

"Does what is in my heart defile what I offer, or am I living the Gospel clearly and fully?"

In other words, am I giving action to the words I write and speak, or are they just lip service? Do I truly believe what I say and live what I post?

Are my actions toward those around me a confirmation of the words that come out of my mouth (and off my page)?

I must constantly check my motives and my heart (which is deceitful above all things - Jer. 17:9). It is easier to hold resentment than to forgive. It is easier to be prideful than to remain humble. It is easier to think about my own needs and neglect the needs of those in front of me. It is easier to be selfish than to be self-less. It is easier to say it than to live it.

I have encountered many "Christians" who weren't so Christ-like. And truthfully (and sadly), I have fit into that category more than once.

I pray that I not only speak and write words of truth, words reflecting Christ, Christ who is the Word...but that I live those same words. That people see Jesus when they see me.

I am completely imperfect and adorned with faults. My righteousness is as filthy rags (Is. 64:6). If left alone, I would be swallowed up by self, indulging my flesh and not giving thought to my actions. But...He (God) made Him (Jesus) who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him (Jesus) (2 Cor. 5:21).

He has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me n a robe of His righteousness...Isaiah 61:10.

I can live the words I write. We can live in this world, this temporary place, and be separate. We don't have to give in to selfish desires and lusts of the flesh.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind...Romans 12:2a.

I pray that this life I live, this life that is quickly passing, would bring glory to my Father in heaven now, in this moment, whether in church, in the grocery store or in the privacy of my home. I pray that others would find Christ not only in the words He chooses to speak through me, but the life I live in Him.

Let us be mindful of our words and actions. Are what I say and how I live a reflection of the very nature of Christ in me?

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Soon of God, who loved me, and gave Himself for me (Gal. 2:20).

***************


Continuing to count my gifts with Ann Voskamp

#46-55 of

46 an old aluminum boat and a homemade raft tied to a tree on the river bank at the back of our property

47 smooth, shiny river rocks colored with the fingertips of God

48 sweet ice tea

49 tangerine shower gel that smells good enough to eat

50 parents who live next door

51 my computer running slow, but running

52 an unexpected card in the mail

53 new school supplies

54 the sweet innocence of a certain six year old

55 triple word tiles in words with friends

and linking with...

It's HIM

The perfect place of resting in who I am in Christ...of knowing it is not what I can do but what He can do through me...

Why is it sometimes hard to stay in that place?

Tempted to succumb to the pressures and opinions of the world which unfairly categorizes, labels and judges...motivated by false hopes, worthless dreams and aspirations that glorify self...validated by human praise, acceptance and positive feedback.

What is this unquenchable desire that can never be satisfied?

It is the need to please man. The want to feel loved and accepted.  The desire to feel equal or better.

Selfish ambitions.
Vain and hollow pursuits.
Empty hopes.
Religious strivings.

A place we have all at one time (or many times) found ourselves.

All of these things leave us feeling discouraged and let down.  When we find that we are in this place, it is essential that we check our motivation.

Why are we doing what we are doing?
Who are we trying to please (who are we serving)?
What is our purpose in living?

The answer to each of these questions should point toward eternity and the One with Whom we are going to spend it.

Without Christ at the center of everything, our life gets out of order.  Our flesh begins to take over with its insatiable appetite.  We can never have enough, never be good enough, and never accomplish enough.

Our heart becomes divided, leaving little space for Him.

We weren't meant to be filled with us.  The Bible clearly warns us that when our heart is not centered on God, it has the power to turn us away from Him.

Therefore beware] brethren, take care, lest there be in any one of you a wicked, unbelieving heart [which refuses to cleave to, trust in, and rely on Him], leading you to turn away and desert or stand aloof from the living God. Hebrews 3:12

The heart is deceitful above all things, and it is exceedingly perverse and corrupt and severely, mortally sick! Who can know it [perceive, understand, be acquainted with his own heart and mind]? Jeremiah 17:9

We are encouraged to guard our heart...

Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life. Proverbs 4:23

Our satisfaction and contentment, our joy and fulfillment, our peace and security...only come when the void that demands to be filled is overflowing with the One Who encompasses everything.

The secret to our success is Him.

The answer to our questions is Him.

That which we so desperately long for, the thing that can never be earned or found in accomplishments or given by man...

It is HIM.

He is everything we have been searching for.

In His presence is where we belong. 

In Him, we are complete.

Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!  And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalms 139:23-24

Teach me Your way, O Lord, that I may walk and live in Your truth; direct and unite my heart [solely, reverently] to fear and honor Your name. Psalms 86:11

O GOD, my heart is fixed (steadfast, in the confidence of faith); I will sing, yes, I will sing praises, even with my glory [all the faculties and powers of one created in Your image! Psalms 108:1

Things Aren't Always What They Seem

Hidden in whispers of concern, criticism and judgement clothe themselves in convincing disguises.

Envy compliments through forced smiles.

Manipulation and control wear many masks, often confusing even the one on whose face they rest.

And there is not even one who is exempt from the trickery of pride.  Pretend humility.

Things are not always what they seem.

It is easy to read this and immediately think of everyone it applies to. 

Even while writing I found that pictures would pop into my mind of people who had manipulated or controlled or criticized or judged me. 

But what about the times when I criticized someone?

Or judged?

Or manipulated?

Or tried to control?

Suddenly, my words came more slowly and I meditated on what God was saying.

Do I have the courage to peek inside my own heart?

Am I brave enough to ask God to show me my true motives?

Help me, God.

Help me to examine the secret chambers of my heart....those places that I've hidden even from myself. 

You see them. 

And You are not pleased.

Forgive me.

All a person’s ways seem pure to them,but motives are weighed by the LORD. ~Proverbs 16:2

A person may think their own ways are right, but the LORD weighs the heart. ~Proverbs 21:2

Don't Get "Dis-Appointed!"

The past couple of days have proved to be a little.....well.....out of the ordinary for me.  I am, by nature, a very positive upbeat person.  But, I let my guard down.  Ever done that?


And I THINK I just used this scripture in my last post....

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.
~Proverbs 4:23.

How quickly I got my eyes off of God's promises and onto my circumstances.  And I moped around all day, unmotivated and unproductive.  REALLY, I know better.

 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
 ~ 2 Corinthians 4:18.

Luckily, for me, it didn't last long.


My mom gave me an article to read yesterday, so as I was sitting in the pick-up line at Logan's school, I opened it up.  And, as usual, God began to speak to me and show me the error of my ways. 


I'm so thankful He loves me (and you!) enough to do that.


Apparently, I had allowed unfulfilled expectations and our temporarily less than perfect circumstances to cause disappointment - which I then allowed to come in and set up camp for a bit.

Not good.


The article said..."Disappointment is not just a sad, emotional state of mind; deep disappointment can actually sever our hearts from faith.  It is the enemy's work.  Demonically manipulated disappointment can actually "dis-appoint" a person from God's destiny for their lives" (Francis Frangipane).

It's naive to think that we will never get disappointed.  That is, unfortunately, a part of life that we can't escape.  It's in those times that we have to grab hold of our faith like never before, keeping discouragement, unforgiveness, and/or bitterness from taking up residence!  It's also in those times that God can do a work in us beyond our comprehension - a work sure to benefit and increase our preparedness for a future season.

Anything and everything that tries to bring us down or halt our forward movement is such a lesser thing when compared to the King of Kings!  We just need the right perspective. And we have to stay alert and aware.


I began to wonder....if this happened to me so quickly, how many other people who are going through trying times are stuck in this place?  How many people have sunk even further and allowed deep disappointment to come in and sever their hearts from their faith?


Are you there? 


Has disappointment found its way into a secret chamber of your heart, robbing you and keeping you from God's plans and purposes for your life? 


Maybe you just got there. 


Maybe you've been there for a while.

Or maybe you didn't even know you were there.


F.F. also said that disappointment cuts us off from our vision, and without vision a people perish.

Have you lost your vision?  Is it hard for you to remember the dreams and promises that God once gave you?


Don't accept the power of disappointment in your life. Recognize it when it comes, and tell it to hit the road, Jack!!

Remind yourself how good God is! 

Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised; and His greatness is unsearchable! Ps. 145:3

Decide TODAY, right now, to renounce disappointment. Forgive, repent, or do whatever you need to do to return to your Redeemer! Be set free and move forward into your destiny!

Don't allow disappointment to "dis-appoint" you!!


God has great plans!!

xoxo

Shelly

Search Me, O God, and Know my Heart

(Let's Talk! Tuesday has been suspended for an indefinite period of time. I am being obedient and trying to refocus on the purpose of this blog.  Sorry Vicki and Starla!  They have been so faithful in posting...You can go check out their blogs anyway!)

It seems that most people I have talked to this week and some things I've read have been about the heart. 

I think God is speaking. :)

The simple word, heart, brings to mind a palette of pretty pinks and reds, Valentine's Day, cupid and his arrow, first love, and just....pure.... sweetness.  Awwww..... :)

But our heart can prove to be just the opposite.

Our heart is a very important, vital organ in our physical body.  It also has a huge part in our spiritual well being.  In our heart, we can love to the fullest or we can hate with a vengeance.  In our heart, we can hide secret sins and unforgiveness or we can expose our weaknesses and be healed.  In our heart, we can form intimate relationships with our closest friends or we can build a wall to keep everyone out.  In our heart, we can KNOW God, or we can say NO to God.

The bible tells us that God "searches every heart and understands every motive."   It also tells us in Proverbs to guard our heart above all things!  Why?  Why above all things?  Because it is the wellspring of life.  It is where we first become intimate with God.  It is where we first hear Him.  But it can also be the place we harbor sin and evil.  Jeremiah 17:9 says "The heart is deceitful above all things..."  Sin is a matter of the heart.  Since birth, our hearts have been inclined toward sin.  We must willfully and purposely choose what is right and good, not forgetting or forsaking God.

God can see through everything, to the very center of who we really are and He still loves us completely!  Right where we are at this very moment!  We don't have to pretend to be something we are not.....when we do we are bringing that which is false before Him.  Be honest about where you are so that He can have the freedom to move in your life and continue the process of molding you into His image.  Are you angry?  Do you have unforgiveness?  What are you harboring today in your heart?  

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.  Ps. 139:23-24

It's time for the church - not the church building or organization - but the CHURCH - the PEOPLE of God -to RISE UP and take our place!  It is time to CROSS THE LINE.  We can't do it dragging our JUNK behind us or hiding it within us, pretending to be holy.  Let's get rid of it and watch God move!! 

xoxo

Shelly

Chapter Four: Losing Heart

Rinehart talks about how everything that makes life worth living - laughter, love, courage, sacrifice - is born in the inner depth of our heart. It is from where our passion comes. 


When we lose heart, we lose our passion.


We become strangers even to ourselves.

She quotes Frederick Buechner -


"....we run the risk of losing track of who we truly and fully are and little by little instead come to accept instead the highly edited version which we put forth in hope that the world will find it more acceptable than the real thing."

Our fear of rejection or fear of being hurt again or whatever fear lurks deep inside, becomes the driving force behind our loss of passion and causes us to hide our true selves.  Thinking we are "protecting" ourselves, we deny ourselves hope and pretend we have no expectations.  That way, we are not disappointed. 

A sad existence.  And definitely God's best for our life!

I love the analogy she uses on page 51-52 from Anne Lamott.  She compares having your tonsils out (a wound to the body) to pain and disappointments (wounds to the spirit).  In order for healing to take place, one must use the muscles around the wound in order to begin to get relief and start the healing process. 

Is pain real?  Yes.

Will we encounter disappointments?  Yes.

BUT!.... we continue living, hoping, expecting, knowing that God has good plans for us!

As David said in Psalms....

[What, what would have become of me] had I not believed that I would see the Lord's goodness in the land of the living!  (Ps. 27:13 Amplified)


Purpose to regain your passion!  Allow God to awaken those places in the secret chambers of your heart that have been hidden.  Allow Him to restore your hope. 

Rinehart states that "if we do not let ourselves hope in God, we will turn in another direction....depending on ourselves or putting our hope in other people."

"Hope that is pinned to God, rather than to people, has a buoyancy to it because it is grounded not in our own illusion of how our story should read, but in the character of God."

And two final quotes from this chapter that I couldn't leave out.....

"Only when the heart can hear, can we receive the experience of being loved, the joy of belonging to the Father,...and pain is often the megaphone that awakens."

"In the inner chambers of your heart, God steps past all your talent and hard work - all that you think He values.  He goes straight for the messy, broken places in you because it's there that you can truly discover Him."

I am praying for you today....that you (and I) will allow God into the messy, broken places.......that you allow yourself to hope again, to embrace life, and to LIVE.......that you will know, today, the joy of belonging to the Father, and in those broken places, you truly discover Him......

XO

Chapter One: Awakening

Wow.

Seriously.

This book, so far, has tugged at my heart, probed and uncovered places that I either didn't know were there or would have rather kept hidden, denying their very existence.

I'm a little nervous.

The last 3-4 years of my life have been about discovery.  Discovering who I am apart from positions, titles, roles, expectations, etc.  Discovering the nature and character of God from God Himself, free from man's opinions.  Discovering what it means to be a follower of Christ, saved., reborn, set free, a daughter of the King.  Discovering His voice, His call.  Discovering His grace.  Discovering. 

And still, I continue on this journey.  A journey whose final destination is not found on this earth, but one that I do not have to walk alone.  A journey which leads me down hi-ways and dirt roads - some bumpier than others, brings me to crossroads and  intersections, exits and entrance ramps.....all leading me closer to Him, each place containing the possibility of finding something new or reclaiming that which was lost. 

Through this study, I am expecting God to awaken that which is sleeping or laying dormant on the inside of me, reveal and heal those things that may be keeping me from discovering all that He is, and bring me to a place of intimacy like one I have never known. 

I just watched the discussion video posted by Angie and Jessica here.  Please go and watch it, it will add a personal touch to your study and offer a different perspective to what you've read.  It also may challenge you to think deeper.  In addition, they have discussion questions here.

Some things that stood out to me personally:

"It's strange the way we meander through life, thinking we are moving forward, only to discover we have left our hearts behind" (pg 2).  (Are you just going through the motions, performing duties, just showing up?)

"The very struggles we would just as soon skip past become the ticket to gaining what we lack, as though God knew just the grist we needed to become what He had in mind" (pg. 2).   (Relationships are risky....not everyone is going to love us back, and most everyone will at some time disappoint.)

"Each of us wants to become.....a woman in touch with God and alive to all the possibilities that walking with Him can bring. It's just that sometimes we get mired in the very clay He dug us out of, tangled in the weeds of our own wanderings" (pg. 3).  (Life happens.  And it's easy to get our eyes off of Him, onto other things, only to find ourselves back in the place where we first started.)

"I find the temptation to shut down on the inside and settle for the crumbs under the table is one that every woman faces" (pg. 3).  (There is a whole sermon in this one statement!)

Each of these quotes either directly or indirectly relates to being hurt, wounded, disappointed, used, let down, etc.  With hurt after hurt piled on top of each other, never receiving healing, we become numb and our hearts become calloused, making it difficult or sometimes even impossible to experience the joy found in relationships with one another and with God.  We begin to consider the invitation to shut down.

Paula states that we can "build a monument to our woundedness, .....shape an identity around the things we've suffered."

When we do this, we cannot truly experience all that God has for us.  We become stuck in time, unable to grow or move forward, unable to hear, for it is....."with our hearts that we listen to Him" (pg. 16).

What have you given up or forgotten in order to eliminate or lessen the risk of experiencing pain or loss?

Are there certain areas in your life where you've built walls to keep others out?

Are you living a smaller version of the life that God created you for?

A relationship with Him is more than following a set of rules, making sure you do everything right, winning the talent show or out-perform everyone else.  I camped out there for a while. It's a lonely, empty place.

God desires intimacy.


He is pursuing us.

He has set His affection on us.

We must awaken our hearts.    

"We must have our hearts intact in order to make the journey of life well.  We must have access to the inside stuff - the longings and desires and dreams and vulnerabilities that make us who we are.  God placed those in us" (pg. 6).

Vulnerability can be scary.  Let us find our courage in knowing that He desires to walk with us through every circumstance, every hard place, every happy place and every place in between.  Ask Him to show you the places that you've closed off, refused entry or hidden.  Trust Him with the places that may still be tender and allow Him to mend your brokenness.  Allow Him to awaken your heart, stirring the dreams, desires and gifts that He has placed on the inside of you.  And embrace the journey that is set before you.

I could go on and on with this chapter alone, but I'll stop here!  

See you Tuesday night to discuss Chapter 2!

XO